I Dont Want To Retire!

Probably the real essence of not retiring is not to stop thinking about beautiful ideas and experiences and sharing them.
I aspire to inspire with God's Good News to mankind, health and wellness, and many more.


God's Better Plan

On this 15th anniversary of God's Message to mankind through the mineral stones I was cleaning, I planned to talk about how God continuously showed His endless love to me despite my endless expression of disappointments.

I cried like a child when I, together with my husband and special needs child were denied of U.S. tourist visas early this year. Maybe because my husband and I were just retired employees without any business who wanted to tour some parts of the United States and visit our close relatives, like our eldest daughter who will be giving birth to her second child this July.

A Plan B was already in my mind in case we will be denied of the tourist visa, so I could recover fast from such disappointment. Plan B was to visit places in the Philippines I have never been to, like Dumaguete City and El Nido. God's plan is always different, as usual, and it is always the best plan. When I went to Dumaguete just to take a peek of the city so I can bring my family there in the future, God also showed me the beautiful island of Siquijor through several "angels" that included a couple who are both pastors.

It took me more than a month to research and plan our trip to El Nido, what tourist spots there to visit and what hotels would be best for us to stay and still take photos in case it rains hard.  I would also like to go to the place with the best sunset, I've researched that would be in Merimegmeg Beach but it seemed going there would be difficult if we would be carrying our special needs child on a wheelchair.

Among the island hopping tours, my priority was "Tour A" because I'd like to see the Big Lagoon and Small Lagoon around Miniloc Island but I also would like to see the "Paradise Beach" which is part of another tour as far as I know. On my way to Art Café to book the tours, a tricycle driver approached me to offer the same tours but when I insisted I'd like to book at Art Café, he offered me to also see a nice long beach called Nacpan Beach where the view of the sunset is great, according to him. My special needs child will surely enjoy a long beach, so I accepted his offer. The road to Nacpan Beach was not yet completely concrete and would be hard to travel at night so the driver offered an alternative to Nacpan's sunset view which was at Merimegmeg Beach near Las Cabanas. Getting there was really one of my wishes so it was a better offer.  The Nacpan Beach schedule would take the place of the tour that would include "Paradise Beach", for lack of time.

When I went to Art Café to book for "Tour A", I was told that they are replacing the "7 Commando Beach" with "Paradise Beach" because the former was always crowded the past days. "What a blessing"  I thought, "it seems like the change was made for me!"

Nacpan Beach was really beautiful, it was the clearest beach I've ever seen so far, just fine white sand and clear sea water.  As expected, our special needs child enjoyed the beach, playing with us and the waves.

After Nacpan Beach, we were brought to Merimegmeg Beach near "Beach Shack" to view the sunset while taking refreshments. It was indeed a great view but I thought maybe it would be more beautiful if dark clouds alternately covering the bright yellow color of the sun were not present. To my surprise, I saw at least 2 hearts formed by the dark clouds, one at a time. The formation and disappearance of the hearts were too fast for my camera to capture but looking at the photos, there was one where I could see two hearts, one overlapping one third of another, though it required the help of my imagination.

God never fails to show signs of His love, I'm sure some of the tourists saw the hearts also. The tricycle driver who came near me to tell me it was time to go because it was getting dark, also saw one when I told him about the hearts. He pointed to a heart-shaped space inside a square-shaped dark cloud.

This unusual view of the sunset with alternating dark gray color of the clouds and the bright color of the sun showed that beauty is not all bright colors, and that even life as a whole need not be all bright colors to be beautiful.  And even in those dark moments, one can still see and feel the love of God.

During the "Tour A" island hopping the day before the trip to Nacpan Beach and Merimegmeg Beach,  the boatman brought me to the Small Lagoon through a "kayak". It was showering, but when we were already inside the Small Lagoon, it really rained.  I was still able to take photos of the lagoon by covering the top of my camera with plastic. I told the boatman it was totally alright because the rain could just be a sign of God's blessings pouring on us. The other tourists on their "kayaks" were happy and laughing while it was raining.

So many signs and symbolism in the whole travel to El Nido reminded me about life and God's blessings.  I am now back to reality, continuously advocating to leave a legacy of orderliness to my children. This is the kind of advocacy that one is often misunderstood.  I don't want to leave unsettled issues or problems to my children.  Even the responsibility to take care of our adopted special needs child, I wouldn't want to pass to my two biological children believing my husband and I will always be capable of caring for her, maybe in our later years with a helper. That is why it is very important for me that my husband and are always strong and healthy. Any small sign of abnormality, even considered normal in old age like memory loss should immediately be addressed with coconut oil and techniques for memory retention. I have no choice but to be very strict with our food, practices, and lifestyle in general. I know this is another very difficult role that can make me indifferent even to relatives who want to enjoy life to the fullest. As far as my and my husband's lifestyles are concerned, I can be as strict or even stricter than Rody Duterte, the newly elected President of the Philippines.  I continuously pray for him by the way, for God to always guide his thoughts, words and actions, and I hope every Filipino will do that, so that all our dreams for changes will be implemented peacefully.

I also hope every Filipino will always remember that God loves us and will always intervene with a better plan, but Divine Intervention happens when one has exerted an effort to move to achieve his goals or needs, not while one is sleeping.

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