God's Birthday Gift to Lyca

 Even before Lyca's 12th birthday last July 24, God's birthday gift for her was already waiting to be picked-up in a warehouse. It was a wheelchair custom made for her special needs.

Lyca's stroller doesn't fit her anymore, a pillow has to be placed on the seat to lessen its "C" curve that caused her scoliosis, and the strap of her bag serves as its head rest.

At last, a new wheelchair though large to be brought inside the car, was custom fit to correct Lyca's scoliosis and the thigh position she got used to which is prone to hip dislocation.

The wheelchair has fixed thin pads under the arms
 to keep her from leaning on one side..

A foot rest based on the length of Lyca's legs 

And a pad at the middle of the seat to
correct the position of Lyca's hips and legs

A head rest measured exactly for Lyca's head...

Dra. Maria Regina Cunanan-Espinosa did all the measuring.

The wheelchair has harness and table top too

How we wish we can bring this wheelchair with Lyca 
wherever she goes !

Thank you Dra. Espinosa and UCP Wheels for Humanity!

Thank you Latter-Day Saint Charities!  Thank you Lord!!

"Dance of Faith"

"Dance of Faith" is an art exhibit celebrating women, art and spirituality. It is participated by 6 women artists from different age groups, the youngest 9 years old. I was one of the artists and my artworks, which are oil paintings, were inspired by the Underground River of Palawan except the portrait of my special child Lyca who was my inspiration to join the exhibit.  Featured here are my paintings in the exhibit where I "walked my faith", my "dance of faith".

"The Challenge"
Size:  15" x 20"
Medium:  Oil Paint

Instead of heeding to my request to paint this piece from my shots of the Underground River of Palawan, my professional artist brother Gabriego challenged me to do it.  This year, 2014, I accepted the challenge when I had the opportunity because I believed that challenges are what life is all about.  We face some amount of challenges, some big, some small, but all of them to make us grow into better persons each day of our lives.

"The Prayer"
Size:  18" x 12"
Medium:  Oil Paint

The most truthful title for this piece is “The Prayer”.  This was a copy of an artwork of God found at the Underground River of Palawan.  Every attempt to copy a detail of His artwork from a photo I shot was coupled with praises and adoration for His creation. Every attempt to highlight a detail was coupled with a prayer for a miracle.

"Mama's Angel"
Size:  12" x 14"
Medium:  Oil Paint

Who else can dream for this blind and multi-handicapped angel than the person she first called “Mama”? That person is Bel Venida (my artist name),  her adoptive mother. It was this child, Lyca, who brought me back to painting. 

"A New Beginning"
Size:  16" x 20"
Medium:  Oil Paint

The Underground River of Palawan is only one of the evidences of God’s existence,  and a reminder to people that He can make miracles happen any time, they just need to have faith and believe that He exists even in the darkest places, whether in a person’s thoughts or in the darkest spot of a cave. The journey in the dark always ends and leads to a new beginning.

Aside from my special child Lyca, I have never expected that the artworks I found at The Underground River of Palawan will tremendously inspire me to give my best to paint on canvas some of God's artworks on the walls of this river. It was very awesome to realize that they were all done through stone formations, and that God conversed with me and said "I love you" to mankind through small mineral stones on June 12, 2001.

Stretch to the max

When we go to an eat-all-you-can restaurant, we don't really taste everything, For viands we knew we haven't tried yet, we still choose what we'd like to taste. If only problems or trials are like that, we couldn't blame anybody but ourselves because we chose them.

Perhaps the biggest challenge or trial a person could have encountered, especially a mother, was when all her children were sick at the same time. All my three children got sick almost at the same time and it was truly very stressful, but I am aware that the right thing to do is simply to "stretch to the max", without snapping. I reminded myself that was what God wanted us to do, to stretch because he wanted our potentials to be maximized. God always knew up to what point can we stretch, so my exposure to such trial lasted for a short period of time only. After that, what is important is that we were stretched to a point, ready to tackle more trials and challenges.

In the midst of a trial, there is always a blessing in disguise that we have to recognize. In my case, that happened while my first child was sick and a day before my second child got sick. We had the eyes of our third child (a multi-handicapped special child), checked by a well-known ophthalmologist because the school for the visually impaired where we wanted to enroll her wanted to know the status of her blindness. "There is blood flowing to her eyes now, at her age of almost 10, if blood should stop flowing to her eyes it should have happened a long time ago." Though the doctor also said it cannot be assured up to when that condition will be sustained, that is a real good news that helped me not to worry too much about my first child. But right after the check-up with the eye doctor was the check-up with the neurologist and the doctor's remark caused me to worry about this special child because she is underweight. And then almost that same day, though it was past midnight already, our second child decided to be admitted to the hospital because of acid reflux he thought will no longer recur. Thank God the pain did not persist and he was discharged from the hospital after one day.

That was not the end of the trial because our special child started sneezing the night her brother was admitted to the hospital. So when I was sure my son will already be discharged, I stayed at home to monitor this third child and performed preventive therapies. That was only for one day because the next day, we brought our special child to the school for the visually impaired for our orientation and finalization of details required for enrollment.

I've heard it when we first went to that school and I heard it again that day from a special child's guardian that it should be the parent who should go to the special education school and learn with her special child. She was just sharing her dilemma because she is the grandmother of the child she brought. I was again somehow affected by this comment because it took years for me to personally attend to my special child full time and bring her to a school. I was trying to look for the best reasons why it should happen that way and the best I found was the trainings I had undergone on health and wellness, especially learning to perform the therapies that could help my loved ones prevent illnesses or recover fast from illnesses.

Only God knows what could be the real reasons, perhaps He allowed me to stretch to the max first before pursuing this new challenge of educating a special child which is a totally unfamiliar area to me.

What's next?

After my anniversary post about my conversation with God, what's next? Every time I talk about God's message, it's as if I've done the finale of a story, so I tend to rest. As if there's nothing better to talk about than God's message. His "I loye you" message to mankind was so comforting but I hope it won't make mankind sleep.

That last statement "I hope it won't make mankind sleep", I just realized was so "human", so lacking in trust in God. Perhaps I was speaking for myself because I was sleeping. We may sleep but God is always awake to watch over us. And then He wakes us up even through simple things like a tv show, or a text from a friend. Like what He did to me...

The next thing I know is I'm at Georgie's place and met her sisters Coroy and Pempi there. Pempi has inspired me since I was a teenager through her artworks, and now it's clear it was Coroy's turn to inspire me too. She said I should continuously and intelligently converse with Lyca, my special needs child, because she will understand me. Lyca is blind and because of cerebral palsy cannot utter words that can be understood. But she could verbally respond, most of the time with actions, and I know she's intelligent because she laughs whenever a song familiar to her was sang out of tune, and would clap her hands unceasingly whenever her favorite choir, the Novo Concertante Manila, would sing. Time will come we will completely understand her and send her to school.

I just can thank God for His wake up calls to meet inspiring people. Shame on me to ask "what's next?".

A New Mission

From the first of May until this morning, I was saying this is going to be an inactive month because my special child's caregiver is having a vacation and I have to take her place.

Until just a few minutes ago, I thought of a better idea. This month could even be a better month than the previous months because I will be forced to stay at home and focus on learning more about cerebral palsy. I bought a thick book about this subject months ago but didn't have the time for continuous reading. Of course I could apply to Lyca, my special child, whatever I'll learn from reading the book and even share my learnings and experiences with Lyca later, even to a large group.

This month therefore is just a beginning of a new mission.

My Little Mermaid

This post is dedicated to my mother who is celebrating her birthday today. She was an example that inspired me to take good care of a special child like Lyca, who was a Little Mermaid during the Christmas party of the rehab center of Quirino Memorial Medical Center, where she undergoes regular physical therapy.

Happy Birthday M O M !!

Mission Impossible Part 2

One of my favorite posts in this blog last year was "Pearl Farm in Davao and Mission Impossible", probably because it tells about the most unforgettable chapter in my life, so far. My trip to Davao was sudden, of course also the stay at the beautiful Pearl Farm resort in Davao. I was not on vacation, I was on a mission, and that was to take back a special child to Manila.

My task in Davao was just to wait if the mother, who asked me to adopt her child who was born inside our house in Manila, will bring back her child to me before I go back to Manila. I brought them to Davao because the parents of the mother wanted to see their grandchild who just turned a year old, and whom our whole household, including that of my in-laws, learned to love so much in spite of the child's disabilities. She is blind and has cerebral palsy, two reasons why we and the mother would like to take her back. So she could be taken cared of, which would be hard in a remote town in Davao four hours away from a hospital.

While the mother's parents were enjoying their biological grandchild, my daughter and I stayed for 2 days and 1 or 2 nights at Pearl Farm resort. My objective was to forget the real reason why I was in Davao, and to take away all my worries. Afterwards, a couple in Davao City very close to our family brought us to the Santo Nino Shrine to pray. My prayer was to grant to the child “whatever is best for her welfare”.

On our fourth day in Davao, it was time for the mother and child with a child's relative to meet us in a mall in the morning. While waiting, my daughter and I shopped for some items, but ended up buying only for the child (a stuffed toy and a pair of cute sunglasses). I asked my daughter, "will she be able to wear this?". We were both sad, but decided to think positively. Unfortunately, they did not appear.

There was a garden resort owned by my husband's good friend, Mr. Puentespina, where we were invited to stay even for just a day, so my daughter and I proceeded to go there. But on our way, the child's relative sent me a message through my cellphone saying that they rented a van and that they wanted to follow us. She did not mention if the child was with them.

It was past noon I think, when I was waiting outside the resort for the van. As they went out of the van, I can't describe how happy I was to see the child. I learned that at 2 in the morning, they kidnapped the child using the rented van with driver. The mother kidnapped her own child.

I think that was August 26, six years ago. The adoption process is now over, only this month, and that was the reason why I haven't told a more detailed story like this one in my first post. Her new birth certificate is now filed in the National Statistics Office. It took years to complete that, because we wanted to be sure about the mother's decision, and some red tapes happened during the process.

Both the biological mother and grandparents of the child are now happy that she is in good hands and is loved so much. The adoption process is over, so she is no longer an adopted child.

As long as you pray

My special child, Lyca, just turned 7 last July 24. I'd like to write a nice post about her birthday but I didn't have the time to compose a usual touching post about her.

Lyca has been helping her Dad and I to pray every night. She might not understand what we're praying about with her, but she pours out her emotions whenever we do, as if she's really asking for mercy.

My current job is not easy since it is something new, so I've been praying with Lyca about my work, not only for me but for the people working with me, especially those handling major projects.

There were many times in the past I was put in a dilemma about making important decisions, and they usually involved people. But I must make a decision anyway, and more often than not, those decisions were reached in the most unlikely manner of making decisions. Prior to that, I had prayed sincerely, and I had always believed they could be good decisions for whatever reasons, because I prayed. Sometimes many months would pass and nobody could tell yet whether it was a good decision or not. I just know in my heart that as long as we pray, God will always guide us to do what is best at the moment, or God Himself will work so that only the best thing should happen.

2009 Babies

The New Year is always symbolized by a baby, so to start the year 2009, I’m excited to talk about the things babies or toddlers will need! I know that a lot of mothers are more excited than me because a baby grows so fast, and sooner or later will need this and that.

When my son and daughter were babies until they became toddlers, I could remember I would go to several malls to look for the exact item fit for them. Window shopping for the right item at the right price would last me a week or two. It’s easier with my special needs child now, since her requirements are not as many as that of a normal child. But I’m equally excited as the other mothers because this kind of child would use children’s items for a long time, and therefore I should choose the more durable ones. Our special needs child is now six years old, but she still has to use the play pen or play yard we bought more than 3 years ago. We knew that would happen, so we saw to it that it was a durable play yard.

I have good news to parents! That exact model of the play yard is not always available at the store where we bought it, but I saw it in a website called ShopWiki, which is linked to several stores. It was fun to go through this website and the sites linked to it because all the items for babies and toddlers can be found there. It is categorized into "buying guides" that will assist the buyer, and each guide presents helpful information that are linked to other sites or stores. The play yard for example, can be found in the "Activity Sets and Play Yards Buying Guide". The "Infant and Toddler Clothing Buying Guide" has countless of different kinds of clothings for babies and toddlers to choose from.

While everyone is skeptical about how Baby 2009 will develop or progress, mothers can’t wait to see what their babies might need the whole year. With proper nurturing, both kinds of babies will be healthy and happy throughout the year!

At peace in the midst of China scare

I am now at peace for the longest time. The irony is I owe this peacefulness to products made in China that is scaring the whole world! What I can say is we are now faced with the challenge to listen to one another, especially to people close to our hearts, and the bigger challenge is when two people closest to us have different opinions. Now is the time for each one of us to have an open mind and heart, because each one of us has his or her own story, just like the children who were victims of the melamine found in milk.

Here goes my own story. Before the China scare, I’ve accepted the fact that I can no longer be employed in any company because of my age. I also stopped waiting to be hired by a network marketing company supposedly as their HR Manager in their Philippine branch, and the reason is a long story. I decided that I was free to be seen in the offices of other network marketing companies, which included Tianshi Phils., where I bought a comb massage gadget months ago. This gadget made me curious because the doctor who introduced to me this comb gadget was able to save a stroke patient inside the plane by just combing the scalp of the patient for 5 minutes. This gadget is technically called Hypotension Apparatus, but also relieves arthritic pain or any pain in any part of the body.

I started to attend the trainings in Tianshi Phils., which is only one of the branches of the company also known as Tiens, and which has offices in 110 countries. It has 9 factories worldwide which include one in Spain, one in Russia, one in U.S. and another one in Malaysia or Indonesia. The biggest factories are of course within the 1,000,000 sqm. area owned by Tianjin Tianshi Engineering Co. in China. The company received several awards for its modern biotechnology, from different organizations like United Nations, and has all the certifications for high quality, food safety and pharmaceutical safety like HACCP in 2007, updated ISO 2000-2005 only last September 7, 2008, Halal, Kosher,etc. It has partnerships with American Pfizer and French L’oreal to maintain products at high quality and world-leading level. Tiens has introduced leading manufacturing equipments from Germany, U.S., France and Japan.

So much can be said about the company, but people who have used their products have much, much more to say. In the Philippines, probably the most amusing anecdote can be heard from Tianshi Davao who treated a girl with brain tumor and the brain tumor was gone after 3 months, just by using supplements like High Calcium Brain Tonic and Cordyceps but I guess they also used the third generation of acupuncture gadget (no needles). Yesterday, we gave Kuya Danny, my brother-in-law, the High Calcium Brain Tonic as a birthday gift. My training in Tiens include modern acupuncture and my husband and I intend to attend a more intensive training next month, where we can be licensed therapists afterwards, if we pass the written and practical examinations.

I see to it that my learnings from Tiens are supported by my researches for reliable materials from the internet. I found a very nice research material which included scientific studies about Cordyceps and which I also sent to most of my friends and relatives. I am now taking Cordyceps so it will inhibit the growth of the benign cysts found on my breasts during my last scheduled sonogram. I no longer fear the possible onset of breast cancer later. If ever there is a gift I’d like to give my mother who is now in Las Vegas, I’d like to give Tiens Cordyceps, because it will also give me peace of mind about her health.

By the way, I’m not yet perfectly well as of this writing. Almost two weeks ago, I was exposed to the rains and changes in weather and almost caught a flu. But I followed the testimonies of others who have tried halting a flu or colds with Tiens Cordyceps, so I took 5 capsules between 9-11 in the morning and another 5 capsules from 7-9 in the evening, with an almost empty stomach, and with warm water. I knew that the Zinc of Tiens can be a big help in my battle with the bacteria, but I wanted to try Tiens Cordyceps alone. It seemed like a long battle, but only a few thick threads of colored mucus came out, I couldn’t even call them phlegm, and my cough was caused by the occasional itchiness of my throat, as if bacteria were trying to pass through my lungs but could not. The itchiness is gone after I finally sought the help of Tiens Zinc but only for one day. I now have reduced the number of Tiens Cordyceps capsules to just two each time. I have to always include the brand “Tiens” just to be fair to all brands available which might have varying effectiveness.

Two weeks of battle with the bacteria and I’m glad that just through natural means I emerged as the winner, my throat the only “injury” as manifested by the short-lived itchiness and some mucus. Why am I doing this battle anyway, if four days of taking antibiotics can also halt the cough? I’m doing this for my liver. I’ve learned in TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) that the root cause of cysts or breast cancer is imbalance of energy in the liver. It is a known fact that drugs can damage the liver. In TCM, just an imbalance in energy can cause damage.

It is not just me who can be affected by the negative effects of drugs but my own special child Lyca, who really is very much exposed to drugs to alleviate the symptoms of her Cerebral Palsy. She now has a lump on her left breast though it could be an early maturation of her breast, but I just cannot remain complacent. Too bad, I cannot try Tiens Cordyceps on her yet. Maybe when she’s older. My only alternative now is to try the modern acupuncture on her, but using only the third generation gadget, the Tiens Acupoint Treasure which is a gadget with a magnetic point to be pressed and rubbed on acupoints that will disintegrate breast lumps. The fourth generation gadget uses electronic methods and is not advisable on her or any patient with tumors.

Now that you’ve read my story, I know you’ll understand why I am now more at peace than ever. It is just too bad that all of us cannot be at peace at the same time. Maybe that is the real essence of heaven. It is the only place where everyone can find everlasting happiness and peacefulness at the same time.

Whatever happened to the rest of my problems? I gave them all to God, of course not forgetting to thank Him everyday for willingly accepting them.

Child adoption is a process

Today I wish to share a lesson I learned from a seminar on child adoption. This blog will not be complete without this and I should have shared this a long time ago, but since my own adoption case was still pending, I didn't think I was credible enough to share it.

You guessed it right, the favorable decision for our special child's adoption by our family was finally released! What is left for us to do now is the registration of her new name to the Civil Registrar. Our special child's new name will be Lyca Louisa Taa Venida.

Child adoption is a process that is ideally accomplished within 9 months, depending on the case. The adoptive parents are evaluated based on home studies conducted by a Social Worker. In our case, we had no intention to adopt a child at first, since we are a complete family with a daughter and a son. The special child was born inside our house so the best support we could give was to be a foster family for the child who cannot be supported by her mother who was our house helper. The child was already 3 years old when my husband and I decided to be registered as foster parents of the child, at "Kaisahang Buhay Foundation". In this organization, we learned that fostering a specific child should last only for a year. After that period, we should decide if we'd like to adopt the child, or foster another child. That was how we decided to adopt Lyca, to give her the identity of a family because we learned to love her dearly.

The subject child of the adoption process is the adopted child, so when the process is completed the child becomes your child. So from now on, I will no longer say that Lyca is my adopted child because the adoption process is over. She is now my child, my special child.

The process of adoption should be explained to the adopted child when he is around 6 to 8 years old, the age when he or she will be old enough to understand. It should be emphasized to the child that adoption is just a process just like a mother having a baby, and when the process is over, he or she becomes your child.

I must admit that when I was younger I never appreciated adopting a child. When God gave us Lyca, I could not differentiate my love for her and my own children. I realized how the love of a mother can be so great. An unconditional love will not discriminate, and it can be offered to any child who is not from your own flesh and blood.

A proof of God's love

It is now July 24 here in the Philippines. Today is the sixth birthday of Lyca, my adopted special needs child. During the last two years, her birthday fell on the dates of her scheduled physical therapy so they were celebrated at the hospital with her therapists, though it was also celebrated at home, and also at my brother-in-law’s home after the mass at Loyola Grand Villas chapel where my family sing as part of the Venida Clan Choir, every second and fourth Sunday of the month. The three celebrations became a tradition so even if her birthday did not fall on her scheduled PT, we will also celebrate it at the hospital this coming Friday.

It is also my sixth year now as Lyca’s mother. At this point in time, I know I can sacrifice anything for her. My two biological children are grown ups now, and I was blessed to have one more child. The fire within me as a mother kept burning for 27 years now. Nothing has changed. It is still that same fire and love that I felt since I gave birth to my eldest child.

A comment in my post on God’s Message from Tomas Karkalas said that I am the luckiest of all man because I was able to talk to God through the stones I was cleaning and God answered. What I can say about that is maybe not. There are so many people as lucky as I am because they also conversed with God and received a response through various ways, but there are also luckier people because they had followed the ways of God even without hearing any response from Him, and are always able to discern what direction God wants them to take. I don’t think I am as lucky as they are. Thinking more deeply about the sequence of events, I remember I was constantly thinking of a child who can help me take away my sorrows, and then His message to mankind through the stones happened, which obviously meant “I love you” (143 stones). After a year, Lyca was born.

The best reason I can think of, why I was “lucky” to receive God’s message is because He wanted to prepare me for this biggest challenge in my life to take care of a child with special needs, even while experiencing financial distress.

What do you think?

Special Child Caregiver

When I went to Greece with my son and daughter in July 2005, I missed Lyca, our adopted special child. A day before our trip back, I was thinking about her condition and began to seriously think about retiring from work so I can take care of her. We were back home on a weekend and when I reported for work the Monday after that, my officemates told me the bad news that our company has decided to outsource medical services through an HMO so all of us in the medical department will be retired before the year ends. It was a bad news, but as far as I was concerned it can be an answered prayer.

At that time, while I was still working, taking care of Lyca was assumed by her biological aunt who was still very young, had a very small frame and petite. I knew she won’t be able to take care of Lyca for a long time. True enough, she started to complain about her scoliosis and had to rest. I’ve decided to take over but I needed to look for a household helper and I was lucky to find a lady whose education has reached college level but had to stop for financial reasons. I later discovered that she likes taking care of Lyca and I have seen how patient and caring she was. Since she was not originally hired as a nanny or “yaya” (in Filipino term), I just refer to her as Lyca’s caregiver which is more appropriate because she does her job not only with love and care but also intelligently.

The above photos were shot only last month at a resort in Tanauan, a town in Batangas along Taal Lake. It has been almost three years since Lyca’s caregiver has patiently attended to all her needs, including some physical and occupational therapies learned from the professional therapists of Lyca.

My in-laws also had a caregiver for my late father-in-law who had Parkinsons and her main function now is to cook meals for all of us living in a duplex house. Whenever needed, she performs as a reliever of Lyca’s caregiver, a role she has performed since the year 2004. The photo at left shows her carrying Lyca on Christmas Eve of that year, when Lyca was only two years old, while the photo at the right is the duplex house where my in-laws live in the two-story half and my family in the bungalow type half of the duplex. Caring for a special child like Lyca becomes enjoyable when you know you are not alone in that noble mission.

Pearl Farm in Davao and Mission Impossible

I hope those who read my previous post The Special Child’s Rights will be able to read this post because it tells what happened before we adopted Lyca, the special child. I assumed the responsibility to care for the mother and child after birth and also brought them to the relatives especially the grandfather of Lyca who lived in a remote town in Davao, a province in the Philippines. The biological grandmother of Lyca stayed for a while in Manila to see this child so she was already with mother and child and a cousin, when we all went to Davao, my daughter Lauren also with us. My daughter and I stayed in the city of Davao while the grandmother, cousin, mother and child proceeded to the remote town where they lived. Lyca was already one year old at that time, her disabilities already known to many.

Lyca’s mother had wanted me to adopt Lyca since birth, but I was ready for whatever can happen when they reach their home in Davao. I said I’ll stay in Davao City to wait for them to come back, but only for 3 days. Whether they come back to me or not after 3 days, I’ll go back to Manila.

In the meantime, Lauren and I had the opportunity to stay with one of the closest persons to me when I was a child, her name is Ningning and lives in Davao City, and also the opportunity to spend a two days and two nights vacation at the most popular resort in Davao, the Pearl Farm Beach Resort in Samal Islands. At first I thought it was really a Pearl Farm so I expected to see shells with pearls but they said it used to be a pearl farm. It is now a resort that was initially exclusive for tourists until they opened it to the public. It has two white sand beaches and another two or more beaches at a smaller island.

That two days and two nights vacation at Pearl Farm Beach Resort felt like a gift from God. It was the first time I took a vacation leave from the office after 15 years, and it covered the eve and the day of my 50th birthday!

The video posted here was created by Ully Jerus, the President of Makati Toastmasters Club at that time, but it was just a series of photos that were of course shot by me, or Lauren if I was the subject. Ully used the "Mission Impossible" soundtrack which I feel is very appropriate because the only reason why I was in Davao was because of my mission to take back Lyca which seemed impossible at that time. I was also known as "Malui", and that explains the title of the video.

To make my story short, Lyca’s biological mother fought for her child to be brought back to me. Their place is not suitable for Lyca’s condition because it is a remote town two hours away from the nearest hospital by boat and four hours by bus, and there were limited facilities at the hospital. Worst was the grandmother couldn’t accept that Lyca has disabilities so she wouldn’t tell everyone about them. The latest that I’ve heard was the biological grandmother of Lyca has already accepted that the best for this child is to be under my care.

The Special Child's Rights

At first I thought I shouldn’t participate in blogging about Human Rights because there are a lot of bloggers who can beautifully discuss that issue. Until I realized that “human” includes every person, including my special child. What if no blogger will remember to talk about the rights of a “special child”? I will never forgive myself!

From the time a child is conceived, it has the right to be well taken cared of to be able to live! Any attempt to neglect the child through the food a mother eats or takes in, the fetus will immediately feel “rejection”. That fact is probably unknown to many. The child will remember that feeling until he or she is born. The mother can make up for it of course, but she has to have a thorough understanding of what transpired while the child was still inside her so she can patiently accomplish what needs to be done.

What about a special or disabled child? If his or her disability is congenital and not hereditary, the rejection he or she felt while inside the uterus is unimaginable! In that case the parents of this child will need all the help to be able to make up for the feelings of rejection this child remembers. But the reverse happens to a lot of families with a disabled child. This child is taken for granted, considered a shame to the family and so on and so forth.

Why did we adopt a special child who is blind and has cerebral palsy? Primarily because she has the right to live! Not to be taken for granted but to be loved as part of our family, just like our very own children.

Several times this special child fought to live! She was just one pound when she was born so nobody thought she was going to live. She was brought to the hospital together with the placenta, her umbilical cord uncut. After one day, she was traveled by car to be transferred to another hospital that had available incubators. There was an accident after her blood transfusion that she turned almost gray. She was discharged much earlier than expected because her neighboring babies died because of an epidemic. By the time this photo was shot, this special child was just taken home because of the epidemic at the hospital. Notice her very tiny head at one month and 20 days old, emphasized by the presence of the adults around her.

If you were counting, this child met five risks until she was taken out of the hospital. She met and surpassed five risks, at the time it was not even time for her to be born! All of us concerned about this child can’t help but ask “what is the mission of this child that she has to surpass all those risks and still live?”

Our special child's name is Lyca, and she will turn 6 this July. Through this post alone, I know a part of her mission is accomplished. Her story is a reminder that children like her have the right to live normally and be educated, and most importantly, the right to be loved!

Don't Retire!

When I woke up this morning, my first thought was “I don’t want to retire!”. Yes, I woke up to the realization that I cannot retire because of two very basic reasons: first, I have a special child to support, and second, my retirement pay has been exhausted.

It’s a good thing that a blog’s title can easily be changed. I realized that the title “My Retirement” just makes me feel too old. I know that most people my age or even younger yearn to retire young so if you’re one of them, give that a second thought. Maybe you just want to retire as an employee but want to have your own business. In the Philippines, you will need at least 10 million pesos to be able to take the risk of going into business and still live conveniently even in times of losses. Otherwise, don’t retire! You may work part time or get a contractual or project based job, you may even study in your free time to enhance or update your skills, just don’t retire!

Count Your Blessings

The year I was involuntarily retired due to the inevitable closing down of our department, I knew what to do with my retirement pay, thanks to the entrepreneur seminar given by my last employer. I learned that I shouldn’t use all my retirement pay for business. I used a large percentage of it to buy real estate properties. These properties are now blessings to my family though we’re selling some of them now. The best blessings, however, will always be those that cannot be bought. They usually come unexpectedly, like the special child who was prematurely born inside our house. The biological mother of this child had packed up all her things and was ready to go home to her province because her mother wanted her to be home on her debut. A week before her scheduled trip, she gave birth on her bed, shocking everyone at home since nobody knew she was pregnant, and the baby was really very small they thought it was dead (one pound only). She was also shocked, at first thought there was a stone expelled by her belly. To make the long story short, the duplex house of my mother-in-law where we live at the smaller house, became one big home for this special child we have now legally adopted.

For this year, 2008, be prepared for the unexpected. It can be the best blessing you’ll receive in your lifetime, though at first, it can be disguised as a big problem. Continue trusting God completely, because He will always prepare you for it.

As the year 2008 starts

I am now on my third year as a retired employee. I must admit that for the past two years I was more scared than secure as a retiree, but I must also say that I was happier. For two years, I did not attempt to get a regular job because I first chose to invest time to pursue a past frustration to study Interior Design. That decision was backed-up by an obligation to also have more time to take care of a special child.

Aside from being able to study, my best blessing as a retiree was to spend the rest of my time as I please. That blessing led me to more blessings, like seeing many flowers in bloom in my own garden. When I was employed it was all greens, because I didn’t have time for them. Like the flowers in my garden, they say I am blooming now, maybe because I have time to make my surroundings help me remove stress.